By Marika Opara Reflecting on competence, softness and why I’ll only melt for a man who can hold his shape. A friend of mine recently confessed she doesn’t know how a thermostat works. She’s nearly 40. I almost choked on my tea. “How can you not know?” I asked, incredulous. But then I realised, she’s never needed to. There’s always been someone there to keep her house warm.   What a world that must be where warmth is guaranteed and you never have to worry how it came to be th